What Types of Therapy Are Best for Men? Here’s What Mental Health Providers Say
Experts Agree These Are the 6 Therapeutic Methods Most Beneficial for Guys
It’s no secret that there is an ongoing men’s mental health crisis — the good news is that as the stigma around seeking treatment has started to wane, more and more guys are getting the help they need for conditions like depression, anxiety, and addiction. Therapy is often considered the gold standard in treatment for many common mental health issues. But therapy requires getting vulnerable in order for it to work — something that can prove exceedingly challenging for men, says Matthew Glowiak, a licensed professional counselor with Recovery.com.
“Stigma, fear of judgment, and a desire to appear self-reliant can all contribute to avoiding therapy,” says Ron Burg, a licensed psychologist for men in private practice. “Many men are raised with messages that equate emotional expression with weakness. Phrases like ‘man up’ or ‘boys don’t cry’ may seem harmless, but they reinforce the idea that vulnerability is unacceptable. This can lead to emotional suppression, difficulty recognizing distress, and reluctance to seek help.”
If you’re finally coming around to the idea of seeking professional mental health support, you may feel overwhelmed by the many different types of therapy available. How are you supposed to figure out the best approach for you? According to Arati Patel, a licensed marriage and family therapist, the ideal therapeutic modality for you depends on what symptoms you’re struggling with, and preferences as far as how you like to process things.
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“Someone dealing with panic attacks may benefit from a structured, skill-based approach, while someone exploring unresolved childhood trauma might need a therapy that emphasizes emotional insight,” adds Burg. “Goals matter too. Are you trying to manage daily stress, rebuild a relationship, or understand yourself better? A good therapist will collaborate with you to match your needs to a flexible approach that can evolve over time.”
It’s worth noting, too, that many therapists aren’t limited to using just one method — according to Burg, they can customize the approach by blending different techniques to meet your needs.
With that in mind, here are experts’ recommendations when it comes to the best types of therapy for men.
1. Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)
Some emotions and experiences are uncomfortable. But Acceptance and Commitment Therapy is based on the idea that resisting that discomfort can actually sabotage your mental health. The main goal here is to build “psychological flexibility” so you can manage difficult life events.
“ACT works by helping you to accept your thoughts and feelings, rather than working against them,” explains Alison Tarlow, a licensed clinical psychologist and Chief Clinical Officer for Boca Recovery Center. “ACT is an evidence-based, successful treatment for addressing symptoms of depression, anxiety, and substance use disorders.”
Because one aspect of ACT is gaining a stronger understanding of your values, this type of therapy can also help you with everyday decision-making, explains Daniel Gospodarek, a licensed clinical social worker at Revitalize Mental Health.
According to Glowiak, ACT is a great fit for guys who are grappling with existential challenges — in other words, trying to figure out how to build meaning and purpose in their lives. So, it might be an approach to consider if you’re dealing with a divorce (or the end of a long-term relationship), major career change, identity crisis, or any other kind of transition, says Burg.
2. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
If you have a tendency to overthink, spiral, or obsess, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy can help you break free from the loop that’s keeping you stuck, explains Adam Wick, a licensed professional clinical counselor at Vital Mental Health. It also happens to be one of the most well-researched modalities when it comes to therapy, and its wide-ranging benefits for anxiety, depression, anger and aggression, eating disorders, and just general stress have been proven time and time again.
“CBT teaches guys how to challenge negative thinking and change how they respond,” he tells AskMen.
According to Glowiak, CBT works by helping you identify and challenge negative thought patterns that are contributing to your stress, depression, and/or anxiety — and replace them with healthier ones.
“Thoughts, feelings and behaviors are all intertwined, so by addressing and reframing our thoughts, we can shift how we behave and how we feel,” explains Tarlow.
Glowiak says CBT is a great fit for people who are more logical or analytical in nature — in other words, people who lead with their thoughts rather than emotions — or those who prefer a structured approach with actionable tools and strategies.
Tarlow notes that what distinguishes CBT from some other popular types of therapy is that it focuses on what’s happening for you here and now, rather than on digging up the past. It’s also a time-limited, goal-oriented approach.
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“Because of these factors, there is the possibility of experiencing relief from symptoms more quickly with CBT,” Tarlow adds.
3. Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR)
This modality involves processing traumatic memories while experiencing “bilateral stimulation,” or activation of the left and right sides of your brain. To achieve this, your therapist might guide you through side-to-side eye movements or have you use tapper devices — that, say, emit alternating physical pulses under your left and right leg.
“Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) is implemented as a way to rewire the brain so that there is a detachment between traumatic memories and how the individual experiences them,” explains Tarlow.
EMDR is quickly becoming one of the gold standard treatments for post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), but you definitely don’t have to have this diagnosis to benefit. If you think painful childhood or past experiences, or unresolved grief, might be negatively impacting your current mental health, EMDR is definitely worth considering.
“This is my go-to for trauma, addiction, betrayal, or anything that’s gotten ‘stuck’ in the body,” says Wick. “It works fast, it’s efficient, and most guys find it easier than talk therapy. I use it with veterans, and anyone with compulsive behavior or childhood trauma. It’s not magic, but for a lot of men, it’s the first thing that actually moves the needle.”
The advantage here, says Burg, is that EMDR allows you to work through distressing memories without telling the stories out loud in great detail.
“This is an appealing feature for men who may find it difficult to talk about painful experiences,” he explains.
4. Somatic Experiencing Therapy
Whereas CBT is a mind-centered approach that revolves around thoughts and emotions, Somatic Experiencing (SE) is more of a body-centered approach. The focus is on identifying and becoming more aware of physical sensations that arise in relation to stress and trauma, regulating your nervous system, and releasing tension.
“SE therapy works by restoring the mind-body connection so that past overwhelming or traumatic experiences can become integrated within the body,” explains Gospodarek. “After these experiences are integrated, somatic experiencing therapy helps to reduce or eliminate trauma symptoms.”
Particularly if you suspect that the headaches, fatigue, jaw pain, or muscle tension you’re dealing with might stem from unresolved trauma, this approach can be a game-changer.
“Somatic Therapy is rooted in the understanding that stress, emotion, and trauma don’t just live in your thoughts — they live in your body,” explains Cheryl Groskopf, a dual-licensed marriage and family therapist and professional clinical counselor in Los Angeles. “Somatic therapy helps men tune back into physical warning signals and gives them ways to release them — without needing to rehash every detail or ‘talk it out’ in a traditional sense.”
According to Groskopf, SE is especially useful for men who feel stuck in overdrive or totally disconnected from what’s happening internally.
“You’re not being asked to get emotional — you’re learning how to work with the same physiological system your body’s relied on for survival for thousands of years,” she adds.
5. Internal Family Systems (IFS)
The theory behind Internal Family Systems (IFS) is that our mind is made up of many different “parts” — each of which has its own unique job. We developed these parts in response to our environment, experiences, and relationships through childhood into adulthood. By getting to know each of these parts and their roles, connecting with them, and cultivating compassion for them, we can gain greater self-awareness and ultimately begin to heal old wounds.
“IFS is a powerful approach that helps you get to know the different parts of yourself — like the inner critic, the one who always wants to “get it right,” or the part that shuts down when things get overwhelming,” explains Patel. “Men often resonate with IFS because it makes sense of internal conflict without judgment. It’s especially helpful if you’ve felt like you’re at war with yourself or constantly switching between being in control and checked out.”
According to Wick, men who struggle with shame or reactivity often get a lot out of IFS.
“And if you keep sabotaging your own goals and don’t know why, IFS can help unpack that without making you feel bad about it,” he adds.
6. Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT)
Originally, Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) was developed to treat Borderline Personality Disorder, which is marked by impulsive behavior and emotional instability. But these days, it’s being used to address depression, anxiety, substance use disorders, and self-harm as well as suicidal ideation.
“DBT is a skills-based treatment,” says Tarlow. “Each week, you learn new skills and then practice those skills in between sessions. These skills teach you ways of handling dysregulated emotions, learning distress tolerance, and how to be more effective in your interpersonal relationships.”
There’s also a mindfulness component of DBT: One of the first steps is learning how to observe your thoughts as a neutral third party without attaching any judgment to them.
DBT may be a good fit if you:
- Have trouble managing intense emotions or mood swings
- Struggle with a fear of abandonment or rejection
- Want to improve your communication with others
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